Friday, December 25, 2009
Yoz... haven't been posting in awhile... hahas... well... let me just give an update on what's been happening to me recently.
On Wednesday I went out Xmas shopping with my brother, we went to City Hall and did quite a bit of stuff there. 1st we went to Jack's Place in Marina Square to eat lunch. We had the lunch set, so it was cheaper than a normal meal but still very filling and satisfying nonetheless. We both ordered a steak and ate it rare, both changed our soup to a lobster bistro, but he drank tea while I killed my digestive system with coffee hahas... mingming still so mingming.
Later we went to Suntec to (hopefully) find the First Tsurugi sword I've been looking for. Unfortunately it wasn't in stock... but I managed to find a nice water bottle for a close friend though^^ hahas...
Then we went to Peninsula to buy my bro's friend's xmas present... on the way there my shoelace got caught in the escalator... and I understood how a fish that got caught on a hook must feel. The escalator kept pulling me in, I panicked and started pulling back. This tug-of-war match continued for some time and I knew something had to give, in the end something did give way, my shoelace got ripped apart... sigh... no one helped me, they only looked, smiled and left.
But enough of that, let's move on to the next day.
On Thursday, I woke up bright and early to prepare for my cellgroup Xmas event. The meeting place was at Queenstown. we're supposed to meet at 12pm. I, being mingming, arrived at 11.30am since I liked to be early. But halfway through I realised that I forgot to bring some crucial stuff and decided to rush back home to take them. Lo and behold my mum "disposed" of those crucial stuff. I still suffer from the guilt from letting everyone down. But we comprmised and the event went without a hitch.
Then I made my way to Somerset to meet up for the Infocomm outing. Had a lot of fun, Went to play pool, played Cluedo at Mile's Cafe and finally went to eat dinner. But since I had coffee the day before, I decided to skip dinner^^ Everyone left one by one and I left too, by that time it was around 10pm and I went home.
Well that's that for my run up to Xmas. I'll probably post my present takings on the next post^^ hahas
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
10:18 PM
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Title: What I'm scared of
I'm scared of being lied to,
I can’t tell anyone what I'm feeling,
I can never say what's really important,
I just keep running away.
I'm scared of losing to others,
I'll do whatever I can to win,
I wish to keep a hold on all that I have,
I don't want to lose anything precious anymore.
I'm scared to facing reality,
I find confusion and frustration when I do,
I keep getting hurt over and again,
I seek solace in my own insanity.
I'm scared of losing myself,
I don't know what I should and shouldn't do,
I won't be able to gauge my limits,
I feel that I'd become a different person.
I'm scared of falling in love,
I fear the pain that I felt once before,
I'm afraid I'll be abandoned if I did,
I know I'm an idiot for thinking this way.
Labels: poems
Signing off at...
11:34 PM
Thursday, December 17, 2009
I'm finally back, but many things happened while I was away...
My granduncle had passed away, he went when I was in my second day at camp. Apparently no one had the sense to inform me about it even though I called home everyday.
Finally finished planning my lesson for physics, pretty heavy stuff this time... hope my student won't die from the brain drain.
Learnt a lot of things in camp. Like how God will wreck my life. Let me explain, once you experienced something so good and amazing, you will get wrecked for life. Like after eating the famous ba chor mee in Ang Mo Kio, every ba chor mee I eat can't come close to the standard of the mee in AMK. So every other ba chor mee I eat from now on just won't taste as good since I'm comparing it to the one in AMK.
Likewise, having experienced the greatness of God in my life makes me feel that everything else will pale in comparison because He is just that good.
Recently fell out with a close friend of mine, which makes me kinda sad... to her, everything I say is just rubbish, and she can't trust me anymore. Personally, I've already done the best I could and I still am. But if this is the way things have to be then it's out of my control. But I won't give up, because I don't want to lose the few friends I have left.
I found out that I'm able to open myself up again... in fact more than before... I used to be afraid of so many things... making promises, the future, falling in love... but now I feel a sense of peace.
Promises feel satisfying whenever I'm able to carry them out faithfully.
The future can be moulded, I used to focus on the things that are out of my control, but now I realised that I can control my future by paying attention to the things within my control instead. Such as my attitude towards problems.
Finding love is still very much an important part of my life, but at the same time, it isn't as if it's my life itself. If I do find love then good for me, if not, it's alright too. It's not as if I don't care anymore... I just believe that there's a time for everything, and it just simply isn't my time at this moment.
I think I've grown up a little after this camp. I still care a lot about the same things I used to care about, but now, I just feel peace in my heart. I mean storms come and go in life. Loved ones will pass away. Friends will leave.
Though we all cling onto things important to us, holding on to things not meant to be will just bring suffering to all involved. Sometimes we have to wait, sometimes we have to let go, and sometimes we just have to love things just the way they are. Someone once said that,"There are things that are beautiful because one cannot possess them." Acceptance is the key.
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
11:24 PM
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Day before Youth Impact Camp 2009
Camp starts tomorrow. I won't be online till wednesday afternoon. Don't miss me guys^^
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
9:59 PM
Friday, December 11, 2009
Why so serious? (lol I know the title is lame)
Hmm... some not-so-serious stuff to say, some serious stuff to say and some heartfelt stuff to say.
Not-so-serious stuff: Recovered from flu^^ hahas... so happy... had a 100% recovery in 1 day... wow new personal record^^ Today I went to church early to finish up the preparations for the camp^^ met Yu Xian and Jie Hau in church, they were making the tribe flag as well as the costumes. lol... since they were in the black tribe they decided to go "Bleach" and cosplay as shinigamis hahas... the kimonos actually look realistic^^ so cool^^ hahas...
Serious stuff: On the way home from church I bought my mum a bouquet of roses, it's her birthday after all^^ and hurried to plan the actions to take before dinner, such as the restaurant, clothes, timing for my dad to fetch us, etc. everything was perfect till the waitress served dessert, it was some fruit cake which made me come close to vomiting :( sadded man.. lucky I managed to hold it in... In the end managed to get home safe and sound^^ hahas...
Heartfelt stuff: I got this feeling from back then. Before, I thought I'd never be able to see you again if I didn't tell you how I felt. But, I realised that I can see you whenever I want, whenever I feel like seeing you. It's not like we're separated by death. We never had any fights. If we meet and chat, it's fun. Right now, and maybe in the future, too, you may not look at me. But it's not like we said good bye forever. So no matter who likes you... I'll make you look at me eventually :)
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
8:38 PM
Thursday, December 10, 2009
I think I got flu... zzz... not really feeling well now... my fever makes me feel like I'm living in a freezer, my nose is like a running tap and my sore throat makes me sound like a frog.
zzz... Don't know how I got this in the first place... yesterday I was perfectly fine... sigh... oh well too bad I guess. Kinda sad I missed meeting Xin Yuh at the airport, she's been studying in Australia and now she's back in Singapore for her summer break, and I wasn't able to go to the airport for her arrival T_T sob sob...
I hope I get better tomorrow... really hope I get well in time for camp... hahas... this year's games are going to be so muddy and starchy hahas... lucky I'm in the games committee, so I just have to watch people get dirty hahas...
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
6:43 PM
Title: So teach me!
I don't know happiness,
The indescribable joys of man,
The contentment of being alive,
So teach me!
I don't know sadness,
The pain of separation and loss,
The desperation of being forsaken,
So teach me!
The experience of happiness,
The knowledge of sadness,
They are beyond my understanding,
So teach me!
I'm waiting for a miracle,
For the thing you've prepared for me,
That lesson for my heart to learn,
So teach me!
Will I be trembling and crying?
Will my heartbeat be accelerating?
I want to comprehend my emotions,
So teach me!
I'll dedicate my heart to you,
For the days we spent together,
For everything you have given me,
So teach me!
Labels: poems
Signing off at...
1:11 PM
Monday, December 7, 2009
Adjusting to life without school
Now that there's no school, I've been sleeping like a piggy everyday hahas... anime and manga all day long... when not slacking then I would go plan my lessons for physics tuition^^
So far giving tuition has been really fun, though there's a lot of pressure(because I wanna teach well) but there's no stress(because I'm not the one taking the exam) hahas...
Wow... just one more week to church camp^^ can't wait... this year's camp looks really good and I'm especially looking forward to it especially since I missed last year's camp^^
Hmm... went to Cynthia's birthday yesterday, was really nice to see her for one last time before she returns to Indonesia... though the party was kinda awkward, due to the fact that all the guests don't know each other and so everyone felt out of place. But nice experience all in all.
Met up with Bernice again today^^ she gave me an early Xmas present, an "angel in a bottle" hahas... looks really cute^^
I stopped drinking coffee for 1 week^^ hahas... so proud of myself^^ but I couldn't resist any longer and drank a big cup just now^^ hahas... digestion problems came back again :(
I'd better hit the gym more often... if not NS sure die... hahas...
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
9:06 PM
Friday, December 4, 2009
Hahas... finally over sia... now can finally slack... hahas... spent the week quite fast.. went out to watch Christmas Carol in 3d with Stephanie, Yu Xian, Jarold, Debra, Bryan, Jing Kang, Jie Hau, Ian and Earnest... was a great experience (my 1st 3d movie) but my eyes feel so pain sia... maybe because I wasn't used to the goggles I guess...
Well... I went to Vivo to buy the tickets for everyone at 10.30am... I said "Eight tickets." and the lady at the ticket counter looked so surprised man hahas... then she said "$104" then it's my turn to be surprised^^ hahas... I hear the cost and I nearly vomit blood sia...
After that I went to Sammy's house. I got lost as usual and ended up there at around 12.30pm. Gave him his birthday present and then Dissidia abit before leaving at around 1.15pm.
I rushed to North Point to buy lunch for my bro (KFC yummy) and reached home and delivered the food at 2.30pm. After resting a little I rushed all the way to Vivo to meet up with the rest. hahas... skipped dinner... after the movie I went home and ate instant noodles instead^^ tiring day... but it was fun^^
Labels: random stuff
Signing off at...
11:31 PM
